I really loved him but...

Written by: 
LUCY AGWANG

I stared at him, absent minded and blankly. Why couldn't I feel anything. The shivers and the blushes I got whenever I saw him were no more. I couldn't explain how I felt,but one thing I knew for sure, was that he was too late.

Reality had slapped me on the face. I had moved on. The words I was dying to hear, didn't rise my adrenalin levels. Maybe I waited for a very long period and I lost hope, perhaps I fought very hard and I had finally accepted my fate.

I then flashed back to the yester years. I had done all it takes to make him recognize me. I didn't love him because of his money: I loved him because I loved him. Liking whatever he liked, I believe I changed my lifestyle to fit his.

I broke my rules. Apologizing for wrong or no reasons, disappointing him was my weakness, crying whenever I made him feel bad. I was a little bit jealous and protective, I wanted him to be mine, alone. Liked everything he posted on Facebook no matter how stupid it was, retweeted everything he tweeted on twitter, and always curious to get his messages.

I didn't see love flow to my side. I was patient, hoped and gave up. I realized I was hurting myself and probably waiting on someone who was also waiting on someone else. I was mocked at and I felt broken. All I did was to sit, and put my head on my knees. Cried as if there was no tomorrow. Cried endlessly.

When I woke up, I realized maybe I was in love with the idea of being in love or maybe I was running away from something. The pretty face was now just plain to me. All the qualities that made me to fall for him were no more.

On another hunt for prince charming.